What girls really want

Fellas this is a little man to man talk. some steps for yall to fallow, mostly for these pimps out their that are trying to get their lady and it just aint working for them.

#1 Get your G walk going

What this means is to walk with a limp in your non-dominant leg. I don’t know why it works but the ladies will go out of control. The more you move them hips, the hotter the lady you’ll attract. It will work a lot better if you have an actual limp, so I do think you should shoot yourself, no sacrifice no victory.

#2 Keep your PIMP hand strong

I know you see those guys that are whipped beyond saving, and once that happens there is no going back. You can’t be a little bich and follow your women like a dog in her Louis V. Be stronger than her bro, it aint that hard. And if she is stubborn. . . well you got two hands.

#3 Get her out of the spotlight

When you’re talking, that means it’s all about you. Not her and how her day was, because your day was hard and you need your back massaged. “the squeaky wheel get the oil!” She aint special, she just another chick trying to take that green.

#4 Triple A (attention, attention, attention)

Also known as peacocking! This is my favorite because just like the axe commercials, you will be like Santa Clause in a whore house. Dress to impress gentlemen, and remember nice guys do finish last in the game of love. In the deep jungles of Africa, the gorilla that bangs his chest the loudest gets first pick on the monkey line up. You want to be the first pick, if not you get stuck with 2^nd best monkey, and that is always bad news.

#5 The Phone Threat

A busy life means that you need to have short phone calls, none of this “you hang up,” “no you hang up!” That’s all a bunch of ish so turn away. One of the only reasons why you should be on the phone is because you need her to pick you up because you are far from hung over, and this just shows how responsible you are. So stick to “babe come pick me up, I'm drunk,” or “girl you need to go on a taco bell run for me,” and my favorite “hurry up and come over, I need some lovin.”

As long as you fallow these rules you will be the man with the pants on, king, the whopper, and just an all-around great guy.